"& say i was touched say everywhere the world enters me leaves behind a wound say because i love shame
i am ashamed to have been hurt say the aching makes a low hum at the base of my remaining life
say my disgrace becomes my obsession say i roam for days
at its borders touch it to my tongue"
-Safia Elhillo, A Rumor
Binge eating with my door open,
excessively needy and somehow detached.
My hands are clawing at whatever they can get,
my heart is beating for shame and shame only.
I can feel its weight on my shoulders,
my thighs,
my stomach.
I can feel the cycle closing me in.
